sparepartsbox | Let's give the boy a hand.

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Let's give the boy a hand.

[Another week, another murder, another twisted execution. Three weeks this had gone on now, and it was getting harder and harder to stay positive about it. At the end of every trial, John always told himself that this would be the last time. That it wouldn't, couldn't happen again. And every Friday, he was proven wrong.]

[Why was it always Friday, anyway?]

[He guessed, on the plus side, a majority of them had been accidents. That was...heartening sort of, he guessed. At least most of them hadn't actually been cold-blooded killers.]

[He wasn't sure if anybody had some kind of post-trial cheer up planned this week. But frankly, he didn't really care. Unlike last week, there was no uncertainty in John's mind over whether or not he wanted to be alone for a while. The answer to that was "absolutely." So once they're released from Monobear rock, John immediately takes to the skies. He doesn't really have a particular destination in mind, so when he winds up on Chandler Beach he has no real complaints.]

[He lands in the sand, immediately curling up on himself. And for a while, he stays like that. Just curled up in a ball on a private beach on an island where technically all the beaches are private because NOBODY LIVES here but you know what...]

[But eventually, the ball method of coping stops helping. Actually, it only takes about five minutes for John to jump to his feet and start angrily shouting at the sky. Mostly indistinct, angry swears at nothing in particular. And all those rocks and shells he's been saving up in his sylladex ever since he got it back are finally coming in handy. Because he sure is hurling them as hard as he can into the ocean. Thisis one heck of a temper tantrum he's throwing at...the moon. Since there's nobody else here.]

[As usual though, his tantrum doesn't last long. He burns himself out even faster than he got bored of the ball method.]

FUCK!!!

[With that final swear, the loudest of all of them, John flops backwards into the sand. His glasses go flying, landing in the sand a few feet away but John gives precisely zero fucks about that. It actually makes it easier for him to cover the top half of his face with his arm as he lays there, panting and resisting the urge to just start crying in frustration now.]

[He regrets ever complaining about his time on the ship now. He'd take that over this hellhole of an island any day.]

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[ Flying off without talking to anyone after the trial and execution was probably the clearest "leave me alone" sign in the universe. For better or worse, however, upon seeing John fly off Aradia decided to ignore the neon flashing sign of teenage angst. Not that this could really be classified as such - it was the third week of murders and executions, and accidental or no, they were...difficult on people. Aradia herself tended to have an easier time of bouncing back than some of the others. Compared to Jimmy and Juniper and Sam and how they'd acted throughout the previous trials, how they'd reacted to each subsequent death, Aradia Megido may as well have been made of stone.

That wasn't entirely the truth, although she found herself at ease with those who had passed. She'd told John himself as much once, hadn't she? That she had learned to be at ease with the cessation of being in any form - a truth which hadn't changed since coming to this place, although the enforced killing was...distasteful.

And she had told him something else back then, too.

Please believe that I would never take joy from the destruction of any soul.

That hadn't changed, either, even if she could smile during the interludes of peace and even during the investigations and trials. Aradia's feelings on death and dying were complex, colored by her own life and deaths as well as her aspect and class. She had grown up with death whispering in her ears, and she had died with those same voices, becoming one of them. Becoming all of them, in a strange way, as she looped back to herself again and again to correct the things that went awry, dooming herself a hundred thousand times.

She didn't follow too closely, at first, but she landed on the beach in time to see the screaming at the sky. Instead of approaching immediately Aradia just wrapped her arms around herself, watching. After John's arm went over his eyes, she approached, scooping up the glasses and kneeling down by his head. ]

John.

[ Move your arm so she can just hook these back over your ears, please, which might be a bit awkwardly done since she's doing it sort of upside down and she never wore glasses anyway, but. ]

You know, I don't think the supermarket actually carries these. If you break them, you're out of luck.

[ It's a pretty mild statement, and she's not actually trying to chastise him too much.

It's just words for the sake of saying something, sitting in the somewhat muddy sand (at least the snow is even further melted now, nearly gone, true to Monobear's suspicious as hell word) after watching the death of yet another "classmate". ]

[John laughs hollowly though keeps his arm right where it is. Truly this is teenage angst at its finest. At least he kept his pants on this time. Possibly because it's still kind of chilly outside, especially with the sun down. But hey, at least it's not bonechillingly so anymore.]

At least if they were broken I wouldn't have to see any of this anymore.

[Ah yes, flawless Egbertian logic.]

[He finally lifts his arm up a little, just enough for one overly-bright blue eye to be visible under the crook of his elbow. He's not crying yet. In fact, he refuses to cry over this especially now that he's no longer alone but he'd been close.]

What are you doing out here, Aradia?

[Despite the tantrum, he doesn't sound angry. He doesn't even sound like he wants her to leave, really. He wanted to be alone, sure. But Aradia is just one person. And a friend on top of that. ...Somehow.]

[He still wasn't entirely sure how that had happened but he's not exactly complaining, either. Especially with how much they've been able to accomplish on the island thanks to that unexpected friendship.]

And that would be extremely helpful to the investigating and staying alive aspects of our stay here, I'm sure. Maybe Jimmy would lend you Cerbee for a seeing-eye-beast.

[ She's actually not sure how blind you are or aren't, really. There's an immediate silly impulse to put on the glasses to find out. Sometimes following a silly impulse isn't so bad, when things aren't okay. So since John won't entirely uncover his eyes and she's curious, Aradia puts on the glasses...and immediately pulls a face. Not that she expected to be able to see out of them, but.

Aradia then proceeds to not take the glasses off, crossing her arms over her knees and just...peering over the tops of the frames. She can pull off human glasses, right? ]

Watching you, obviously. I don't think you quite gave Karkat a run for his money in terms of originality while raging, but it was impressive all the same.

[ Watching out for him while he was having his little argument with the universe was slightly more accurate, but she's at least attempting to sort of not be depressing, here. If only because she knows how fatalistic conversations can go.

Aradia had held too many of those with herself for sweeps. ]

What are you doing out here, John?

[Here's your fun, new fact for the day, Aradia. John is basically blind without his glasses. In fact, right now you're basically just this big blurry mass of grey, red, and black. Putting his glasses on was probably not the most fun way to learn this but it is the best way, all things considered.]

Pfftt, I don't think anybody can hold a candle to Karkat in that area. It's probably his super high school level talent, remember?

[Yelling or swearing or something like that. Whatever it was they said. Hard to believe that was only four weeks ago. It seems like that single week of peace had been so much further off...]

I don't know. [At that, he pulls his hand away entirely, letting it flop uselessly into the sand/snow beside him. This is gross but he doesn't care. He'll just take an extra long shower after this. Yeah...yeah that sounds like a good idea. Maybe even a bath...] I just kind of...wound up out here. I didn't mean to come out here, I just needed to get away from...stuff.

[Read: everything.]

[ Remind her to never let John wander around sans glasses on murder island. That sounds like a recipe for disaster. ]

I remember. "Super High School Level Bad Temper", wasn't it? Well, there were a few we thought he could pull off, but...

[ That had been during one of those mandatory yoga sessions, hadn't it? The ones where almost none of them actually did yoga, but instead sat around chatting, while Monomi tried to lead them through the poses at the front of the class, only a few trying to copy her. Jimmy, of course. Franziska. Juniper...

John apparently just didn't bend that way and Aradia's wings hadn't been optional at the time, so they'd ended up sitting on their mats talking about friends who weren't there. That had been when they'd assumed they would be free to go as soon as they got all the "hope shards" or whatever it was Usami - because she'd been Usami, then - had always been nattering on about. ]

It'll still be there when we get back.

[ That's...that's not particularly encouraging, is it, Aradia? Noticing he finally stopped hiding behind his arm, the troll took off the glasses for the horribly blind and hooked them on. Or...tried to. ]

I initially thought just trying to become better friends and getting powers back might net us something...useful, and be worth the wait. But I don't think that the creature is going to stop until we're either all dead or one of us "wins", and I still don't have anything remotely useful for winning against him.

[John gives her a hand in getting his glasses back on properly. He has lots of experience in the area, he is basically a master of putting on glasses. Even when lying down and having someone else put them on first.]

Him being Lord English or Monobear? There are a lot of big bad hims vying for our attention now, it seems.

[He sighs, pushing himself up into a sitting position once more.]

To be honest... as far as Monobear goes, I am not sure if it's even possible to win. SBURB was one thing. We all may have fucked up but at least, under normal circumstances, it had clear, proper conditions for winning. I can't say the same for this situation we're in now.

It's funny...I think I might understand how Rose felt now, at least a little bit. Back when we first found out our session was unwinnable, I mean. I can't see anyway of beating Monobear that doesn't involve attempting to work around the rules he's set up.

[John hugs his knees to his chest, propping his chin on them and staring out over the ocean.]

But I'm not really sure how we can do that either.

[Planning things has never been his strong point. That sort of thing is better left to people like Rose and Jade.]

[ It's a good thing one of them can put glasses on. Especially since the one who can is the one who...has to. So. ]

I meant the "him" that is more immediately in the way. And about Lord English...he'll get what's coming to him sooner or later. You don't have to worry about that. All loops have to be tidied up, remember? Even his.

[ And their "win conditions" may not be obvious at home, but...Aradia has a general idea of what should happen. Or what might happen. It's confused and time-involved but mostly she's pretty sure and confident that they can win, and that paradox space...might actually be on their side, for once. ]

I spoke to Rose back then. She was the only one of you I ever talked to, because...I once did something similarly self-destructive. And I thought it was important to say something, even if I knew it wouldn't work and even if I knew nothing could change. Back then, I only believed that we were working towards our doom, but that there was no choice but to do so.

[ And she...really, really doesn't want to think like that, ever again. She's still fatalistic and morbid in her own peculiarly cheerful way, but...going back to how she thought before? No, Aradia doesn't want to do that. Aradia wants to believe there is something they can do. She wants to believe that it isn't doom that surrounds them, every waking moment. ]

So we figure out a way around his rules. We can't scratch this session, but...

[ At least, she doesn't know where they'd do so or if that is even A Thing, and since their relevant powers are gone... ]

That guy, he's afraid of "Naegi Makoto" more than anything else. A high school student whose talent was "Good Luck". Don't you think we ought to be able to win, if that's the case? What could he have done that all of us together couldn't do?

Heh...right, right. I remember.

[Okay, so it might have slipped his mind a little bit with everything else that's happened. But Just mentioning it is enough to make John remember that particular conversation much more clearly.]

But right, yeah. We were going to talk about him once we got out of the trial, weren't we?

[Clearly the execution disturbed John enough to make him forget about their eye conversation during the Great Spooky Derailment of Case #3.]

Sure would be nice to have this Naegi guy here. Or some way to contact him or something. Or maybe just a bit of his super luck. I don't know about you, but I think my luck is the exact opposite of Super High School Level. [John sighs.] If it weren't, I could have done something about this already. Probably. Maybe if I had Super High School Level Good Luck, I wouldn't have lost my powers. Or Monomi would have been able to give them back to me when I asked...either way, I could have stopped all this before it started if I hadn't lost them.

Monomi can't seem to give us back things in full, anyway. My telekinetics are way down from what they should be. It stands to reason that even if you got the zapping back...it might not be at full strength.

[ Leaning her chin on her knees, Aradia curls up further, only partly for warmth against the still-coldish weather. Her silly Christmas sweater is back in her cabin. ]

We were going to talk about him, yes. And...I don't know. The only way to get out of her and get our powers back would be to "win" the scenario proposed, wouldn't it? I haven't been able to think of a single loophole so far. And I'm supposed to be able to see things like that. Or at least...I'm used to seeing more than one path, these days.

Yeah, it's because Monobear broke her stick when he changed her. Some things she can't bring back at all, apparently. My zapping thing is one of them. She said something like time travel is too much...

[And even though his power is DISTINCTLY DIFFERENT, it's still the same basic principle.]

Yeah, he has it wrapped up pretty tightly. Loopholes are hard to come by. I guess a "graduation" is technically a win? But it's only a win for one person, not all of...

[John trails off, a lightbulb seeming to click on.]

...do you think that's how Naegi won his session? If his talent was good luck...maybe he got away with murder and "graduated."

[This is nowhere even CLOSE to what happened but it seems like a pretty solid theory to John. If something like "good luck" can be a talent, after all...]

I don't know. From the way they were talking about him...I don't think he sounded like the sort of person who would do that. You didn't hear how they got when they saw him, and heard that Monobear was most afraid of Naegi, out of everyone and everything in the world.

[ Actually, if anything good came from that trial..it was how happy the ghosts had seemed. How hopeful. Like a switch had been flicked on. ]

And really, I'm not sure if Monobear would find someone "graduating" scary. That's what he wants, in the end, isn't it? For someone to get away with murder and to kill everyone else. That would probably change someone, participating like that, with that intent. That's probably what he's shooting for.

[ Aradia really, really has no interest in winning a game for him, because fuck that guy.

Winning a game for the team? Yes. ]

So...the question is, is there a win scenario where everyone can win? I don't believe in a no-win scenario.

[ ............ ]

Not any longer. I don't want to believe in that sort of thing any longer.

Oh, right. Good point.

[He couldn't hear the ghosts but it should have been obvious that this wasn't the case since Monobear is scared of Naegi. Duh, John. Of course he did something amazing and pulled out a win without breaking or following the rules.]

[Duuuuuuuuhhhhhhh!]

I don't want to believe that either. I want there to be a real win scenario, I really do. But I just can't see it. [He's silent for a moment, before chuckling hollowly.] Hehe...it's a shame neither of us are seers. We could probably do with the help of one of our seers right now.

[Light and Mind? I mean damn, they'd be set with either of those.]

I think it might be best we're not, really. I'm suited to being a maid; you're suited to being an heir. Although talking to them...

[ It would be nice to have a little light shed on their path. Or to see it through Terezi's mind. Unfortunately, they were both back home, and they had no way of getting back there.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. They had one way of getting back there, but it wasn't a trip for two people (or three people, counting Roxy), and the requirements were a bit...steep.

...That fact doesn't stop her from saying it, though. ]

There's one way to talk to them. But I'd say there's better reasons for that than talking to friends, however much they might be missed.

[ Just in case you forgot you were talking to the creepy, morbid troll. That was dangerously close to her old speaking tone. Was that what she sounded like when she was being serious, now? ]

[John gives Aradia a rather blank stare at first. As though he's not quite sure what she's getting at. Which is exactly what the problem is. Protag brain doesn't allow for him to immediately think of murder as an option, no matter how serious things have gotten.]

[But eventually, it does click and he frowns.]

Yeah, you've got that right. I miss Rose a lot, I mean I haven't seen her for more than a few seconds in three years now but that's not even an option. Plus, even if one of us did go back, it's not like either of them would be able to help from there. It's not like they can un...do...

[He trails off. He'd thought of this once before, truthfully. Briefly considered it before putting it out of his mind completely after Monomi told him she couldn't restore his powers.]

So yeah, I guess we're just on our own basically.

[Subject change. Not even suggesting that.]

[ John gets a frown in return, mostly because...well, okay, she admittedly didn't make the suggestion very clearly. So that's somewhat fair.

But he hadn't come up with anything better, so at least discussing it seemed okay.

Although it wasn't as though she wasn't aware that killing and death freaked John out (their first conversation had more than covered that) it wasn't something she was edging around to lightly.

It hadn't been something she'd thought about seriously, or at least not something she'd put into words before, but... ]

I know exactly who would have to be done away with in order to stop this from ever occurring, though.

[ True. From the ghosts, from the information she'd gathered...Aradia's fairly sure she knows the name.

She says that in a flat tone, looking at nothing in particular instead of John. Maybe looking at time itself, though she can't see anything of that, here. ]

If you stop someone throwing a pebble in a pond, you stop the ripples, too. Stop that person from starting any of this...

[ She gestures around. ]

...And none of us were ever here. None of us ever died. None of us ever killed - in this place, at least. And none of them ever died, either.

[ Aradia means the ghosts, here. She's still not actually said how that would happen, but - it's not like she's suggesting they go and ask Rose and Terezi for help.

No, she's apparently suggesting removing the source of the issue before it, you know. Became an issue. ]

[John sighs, frowning. But he is, at least, listening. Whether or not he's taking her suggestion seriously or not is another matter entirely. He's still frowning, but it's less severe, less angry. Somehow, it looks more tired and almost sad than anything.]

Yeah, but in order to do that... Do you hear what you're suggesting here? I'd have to kill somebody. [No use talking around the elephant in the room anymore. It's pretty obvious that they both know what Aradia is suggesting without actually saying it.]

Murder somebody in cold blood and then sacrifice everyone else in order to get away with it. I don't know if I can do something like that, Aradia.

[He sighs.]

But...I don't want to see or watch anybody else die. [That's an important distinction to make. It's one thing to see the dead bodies. He doesn't like that but it's at least easier to deal with than the executions...]

Edited (now that his account is renewed...ICON TIME.) 2014-01-02 22:00 (UTC)

I'm not suggesting that, exactly. [ Except she...is. There's no getting around that, but it's hard to think of it as "murder" when she's suggesting exactly what she's suggesting. How many thousands of times has she made this decision? How long since coming here has she suspected she might be just another doomed offshoot? ]

I'm suggesting we scratch the session. Just think of me as your Beat Mesa.

[ Which would involve murdering her. A little bit. At least she's not grinning when she comes around to that. Or...suggesting he murder someone else? Is that better somehow? ]

If you got back, you wouldn't need to take care of Junko Enoshima, either. If you pointed one of the Aradiabots in her direction, and told them what would occur, they would...see to it that the timeline never went off-track.

[ There is sudden annoyance, then, as Aradia actually looks back over at him. ]

This wasn't meant to happen, you know. There's no way it could have been. It's not like I'm not surprised sometimes by things that happen, but this...it involves three people who should be somewhen else entirely. I know you're not...you're not a time player, so I suppose it is asking a bit much for you to knowingly doom yourself.

[ Actually, this might be easier to ask Dave to do, but unfortunately the other player who might get throwing time player bodies at a problem until it went away wasn't, you know. There. ]

I've said I'm done with dying, and truthfully, I'd like to be, but...this is what I'm made for. To straighten things out. And it's the only way I can think of to ensure everyone lives, including those who have already died, as well as those who might come after this.

[ Of course the only thing she can think of is completely insane, have you been paying attention to your interactions with trolls and/or time players at all, John? ]

...But obviously I can't make you do anything. [ ...Well, she probably could try, but she...won't. ] And the only way it would work would be if you would. You're the only version of yourself who can do what you can do, I think. No version of me can do that.

[ You are the only person in the universe who touched the intangible treasure thing you weren't supposed to be able to touch.

Sounds like a dare to me. ]

Edited 2014-01-02 23:38 (UTC)

W-woah, wait! Wait. Back up.

[Okay, maybe John didn't quite get everything that Aradia was hinting at. Because he sure as hell didn't pick up on the fact that she was offering her own neck up on the chopping block.]

[Some of the color drains from his face and he laughs nervously. It's almost as though he's forgotten how to breathe properly.]

Ahaha...okay, obviously I missed something here because...you can't seriously be asking me to kill you. I must have some crazy wax buildup in here, [He sticks an index finger in each ear, rotating them as though cleaning out his ears.] you want to run that by me again?

[John have you been paying attention to anything at all.]

I certainly wasn't suggesting you kill someone else. [ She's confident that if he could get away with it, it'd be a win condition for all of them, dead and alive...

...and the most logical way to "get away with it" would be for her to bet he one to die. That would be more controlled. And it hadn't even occurred to her to suggest someone else for the role of dying.

Perhaps that said more about her than she would like, but contemplating it would be pointless at the moment. ]

You told me that you could change things, at home. I believe that. [ She has to, in order to suggest this. ] ...And we spoke about it, didn't we? If you had a time player, or even the seers, to help guide you...I think you could learn to control it.

There are thousands of "me" at home, and Dave as well. There's Rose, and there's Terezi. There's everything we need to change this timeline. It's just a matter of getting to it.

[ Granted, there's the whole thing with Jack and Lord English, but skipping around in time means not being late, and that can just...be put on hold. For a little while. ]

And the only way I've come up with to do that so far is for you to "win" the game. That's the only scenario in which everyone wins. If you graduate, you go home. If you go home, you can change things.

[ And, if you need it outright stated... ]

The only way to graduate is to get away with murder. The best way to get away with murder is to have the victim help the culprit. Don't you think? It'd be easier to stage the scene to get enough wrong votes to graduate.

[...why couldn't it have been earwax? John knew better, he knew he'd heard right the first time but...god how he'd hoped he hadn't.]

[Because she's right. And he knows it.]

[He's known since Monobear took over that he was perhaps the only one who could fix all this. And, likewise, from very early on, he'd known that there was really only one way to do it. He'd just opted not to acknowledge it because John Egbert does. not. kill people.]

[And yet here he was. Actually considering murdering someone he'd come to consider a friend. He wasn't sure if that made it worse or better.]

[Probably worse.]

Ha...haha...god.

[He inhales deeply, pushing his hands up his face, under his glasses, and through his hair before slapping them down on his thighs as he uncurls his legs.]

Why does this whole thing just have to be so...stupidly fucked up?

[That's...not exactly a no. Not an outright yes, either but definitely not a no.]

[ The fact that it isn't a no actually causes Aradia to relax, which it...shouldn't, probably. But her shoulders loosen, and she uncrosses her arms from around her legs, shifting to sit cross-legged instead and offering up a smile.

Not one of her wide, creepy ones (though she still hasn't exactly gotten over doing that, as John knows better than probably anyone), but a smaller one that seems markedly more genuine for it. ]

Because we didn't get marked down as "Super High School Level Good Luck"?

[ In this universe or the other.

Well, no. They both had escaped death back at home, hadn't they? Aradia tended to think of herself as lucky. She had done ever since she'd woken up, the fire burning her back to life. ]

...I don't really have an answer to that. I don't know how much more some of the others can take, though.

[ Each trial ends with more and more people starting to snap. Wasn't that what had caused the last trial? Maya had snapped. And this week...someone else probably would, too. And the week after, and the week after that...

There didn't seem to be any end to the game in sight, unless they ended it themselves. ]

I'd wager it's because Monobear is stupidly fucked up, though.

Understatement of the century there. I didn't even know it was possible for a stuffed toy to be insane. I almost feel like I should apologize to Dave for laughing at him about the damn puppets for all those years.

[John falls silent again, staring at his feet. Honestly, he's not sure how much more of this he can take. Granted, he'd sooner snap and kill himself than snap and kill somebody else. But he really doesn't want to do that either.]

[So maybe just...slowly go crazy. Again. Only in a much, much worse way than the boredom on the ship.]

You're right though. About everything...and I kind of hate that.

[He finally pulls his eyes away from his shoes and locking them on Aradia's instead.]

Because I don't want to kill you. Like I said, I am pretty sure I slightly misjudged you when we first met. And these past few weeks..as much as I hate almost everything that's happened, I've enjoyed getting to know you. And I'm pretty sure we're sort of friends now.

[Only sort of sure though, apparently. You know, maybe. Possibly.]

It's something to keep in mind for the next time you see him.

[ Though Dave's puppets probably weren't this murderous and crazy. Aradia's almost certain one of the others would have mentioned seeing something like that on their viewscreens. It's half a joke, half not.

As to the rest, well...it's not as though she wants to be right about this, either. Ideas about resetting things had been vague in the back of her mind since the first murder, and more recently the desire to get everyone out alive had been more pressing. It hadn't crystallized until recently.

Only sort of sure? Even if that's the case, that gets one of Aradia's wider, cheerier smiles. Which isn't at all matching with the mood, but... ]

I think of us as friends, too. The human kind, I mean. [ As in she doesn't even consider you an enemy, at all. ] I've spoken to doomed Johns before, but I don't think I would have called myself their friend. I like everyone here, you know, more or less. That's why I want them all to get home safely. And why I want us to get home safely.

[ And that's why she wants you to kill her. ...Their lives make no sense. ]

[Well yeah, only sort of because he wasn't sure if she returned the sentiment! Friendship is a two way street and he was kind of a rude jackass at first.]

Yeah. [Finally, he smiles a little bit too before looking back at his shoes.] I want that too, but...I just wish there was a way to do it that didn't involve be either directly or indirectly killing everyone else.

[He laughs lightly to himself. You wouldn't think something like NOT committing murder could make a person feel selfish. But John sure does feel that right now.]

[Why couldn't there be another way to do this? Why?]

But life isn't fair and sometimes we have to do things that we don't want to do, right? If nothing else, at least SBURB taught me that much.

[ That sounds like a yes. A reluctant yes, but, well. It wasn't as though Aradia had thought he'd be gung-ho about it when she pointed out there was a way back home and through all of the pitfalls Monobear kept throwing at them. ]

No, it isn't. [ Aradia laughs, low. ] SGRUB taught me that much.

[ As had dying. Dying had taught her a great deal. And she'd never wanted to repeat that lesson, but...in the end, dying was what she'd been made for. It seemed that way, at least. ]

...So, are we going to do this?

[ Because discussing it was one thing. Committing to it was another. ]

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